Seeking Other First Responders for Support

I'm a former paramedic. I have been battling PTSD and other disorders. I am recovering quite well but one of the things I did will treating and healing was I shut down completely, went inward. There are years I don't have any clear memory of. It was like I woke up and the whole world changed. I missed The Lockdown. I missed my country falling apart. I lost all of my friends and support group, especially my fellow responders. I lost every job i had due this time. I lost everything. Now I'm rebuilding. Which is lonely and incredibly difficult. I have 2 people IRL outside of my family that I could count as friends, but even they have... Moved on. I am broke. I live with my parents. But mentally... I'm stable. For the first time in almost a decade I have a bit more control and confidence. But being middle aged with no financial stability and no real way to get out into the world again it's like I got better for no reason. I'm this awkward kid that still gets bullied. The last date I went on told me I was worthless. The man before that was emotionally abusive. So... Now what? I'm just going to be this poor lonely person for the rest of my life?