Moving on from a Narcissistic Relationship

Speaking from experience, it's not going to be an easy road, but it's a very necessary adventure that will lead you to life that is unimaginable. One of the biggest parts of my healing was not only to know, but to personally intentionally own the fact that my narcissist had me so brainwashed that I didn't know who I was, what I needed/wanted, where my true value lies, etc. My mind was all in a fog because of false accusations, mistreatments, belittling, reversed blame, extreme control, etc. Once I realized I was in this fog and couldn't see my way out (knowing I couldn't do it myself), I reached out for professional help through time in the behavioral hospital and then repetitive counseling appointments with someone specializing in trauma counseling. I'd been told so many lies and twisted truths in my 26 year relationship that I didn't know who I was (most important), what I needed, and which way to even go when I "move on." Professional counselors are available to help you ground yourself in your new safe life, to get to know yourself again or for the first time, to clear the fog and have strength to persevere and carry on in this new unfiltered world you have the privilege and joy to live in. Your feelings, thoughts, needs, wants, opinions, desires, etc are all valid and valuable. It's time to focus on you right now. You didn't get this damaged and broken in a short time. It was more than likely planned and played out takeover through a long period of time by your narcissist. It's a slow fade away, and a slow march back to power and happiness. There are many steps to get you to a wholeness again and it will be so worth it. You deserve to be the best you that you can be. You are needed, valuable, important, and beautiful in your own unique way. Please ask for professional guidance. And please know counselors are like shoes, just cause they're the right size doesn't mean they fit you. Try a few sessions with various trauma therapists to find the one that fits you that you can connect with. Find one that not only listens to you but helps you learn to grow stronger and wiser. If you're not gaining wisdom and insight about yourself, it's probably the wrong fit. Keep searching. It's so incredibly worth it. I pray you will have success in your journey to healing and happiness. God bless you and congratulations on reaching out. I hope some of my babbling has helped you in your situation.