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Maclir

140d

so... not even the worst case scenario in my mind was as bad as what happened to me. this happened yesterday and I'm still reeling. I was going to leave my campus to go home for winter break, and the moment my mom set foot on campus it was fight after fight with us. things exploded and she ended up damaging all of my art projects that I spent countless hours slaving over, nearly completely destroying one- its missing pieces that she tore off, wires are bent, it's covered in dirt because she threw it. she broke my ceramics, bent a wire sculpture and damaged the outside of one of my other sculptures. she slammed me multiple times in the car door and threw her weight against it to hold it shut on me while screaming at me to "get the fuck out of my car" before she destroyed my work and threw my belongings away. she tried to take my phone from me and only gave it back when campus security was called on us and I managed to beg for it back. the only reason I'm still alive after all of this is because my closest friend gave my number to the rest of our group (I removed myself from everything with them on social media so the only way to speak to me was through text) and they all texted me and one of them who lived nearby drove to come find me and make sure I was alright. he stayed with me for hours after the fact and I ended up back in my chats with my friends and in a discord call with them watching dumb videos for the rest of the night until they went to bed. I can't sleep because every time I hear anyone in the hall, I panic thinking that it's my mother following through on her threat to gain access to my building via campus security to take the rest of my things. it's 5:30 as I write this- i have not slept yet tonight, and I can see the sun hasn't started rising quite yet, but it's about to. I am scared shitless and at this point, I'm sure I'm being cut off from my family. they have taken all my money and if I'm cut off, I will be hopelessly lost. they've taken every cent I've earned since I was 16, I have no money and nowhere to go if I am thrown out. I have a partner who is willing to let me stay with his family over winter break to put an extra buffer between me and my family, but that cannot last forever. I am having a myriad of medical issues as well and that alone will likely keep me from being able to work, so I won't be able to make anything if I'm as prone to randomly collapsing as I am. I am hopelessly alone and lost no matter what happens, and I do not trust my biological family anymore after all that's happened. I don't know if this post is a cry for help or if I'm just overwhelmed and begging for sympathy from people who know nothing about me like the asshole that my family has done a wonderful job of convincing me I am, but... I don't know. I need to get the thoughts out somewhere. it's a mess in my head and I'm lost on what to do or where to go. I'm facing something far worse than i ever imagined.

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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