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NemuShroom

469d

I'm very stressed. My mom said once while under the influence that I might be kicked out from house. I had no other option then move out with my family and now I'm suffering a lot. My mental health is going down to the point that I started to having very bad thoughts again. And it's all thanks to my mom who keep saying that I fake my panic attack, my depression and everything else. She is very toxic and I genuinely start to hate her. She told me many times that I am a problem. That I shouldn't be born. It hurts, she is my mom and she is keep making me feel like trash. I'm just very tired of it. She even tried to set my mind against my boyfriend talking bad things about him so I could deny his love.. I don't know how to act around her anymore. I can't just run away as I live on the couch in her livingroom but listening to her drunk talking is overwhelming and I don't want to hear that anymore..

    • titch

      468d

      i had a different situation at my family home. it was very very toxic. i turned 18 about 5 months ago and i pretty much got kicked out. i thought it was so unfair and i had so much hatred for my mum and stepdad and my sister. i still don’t get on with them but my mental health has improved sooo much since moving out, my mental health was really really bad before and it’s still not amazing but it’s better and i feel much calmer and safe even though i live in a shared house with strangers. the simple thing of not being around all the toxicity in the place you’re supposed to feel loved, safe and accepted, is really helpful. i would say maybe talk to the council about housing benefits if you don’t have the money to move out and then that’ll help contribute to the rent. and perhaps that additional space between yourself and your family will help to heal your relationship if you want to become closer with your mum again. you won’t have as much conflict because living together, even with your family, brings up way more arguments and problems that wouldn’t be there if you lived elsewhere. you’ll notice you don’t have as many fights with your friends as you do with the people you live with, or you have different ones. it may be unfair because that’s where you’re supposed to be allowed to live, and you may wish things were different, in the same. but i wish things were different while knowing it’s for the best taht i left.

    • AstraDragon

      468d

      I'm sorry you are going through this. I may not know you but I want you to know that you are important and loved even on the days when you don't feel it. We are here for you!

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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