Coping with a Serious Breakup When You Have BPD

When I broke up with my partner of 3year (approx 2month ago), I cried and cried cause I still loved/love them. I spiralled and now I’m starting to come to terms with it. Personally I was in a toxic relationship and didn’t realise it. I think allowing yourself to feel what you need to and then trying to “work on yourself”. There are still times when I see, hear or smell something that reminds me of them and I breakdown crying, but I think just remembering that it is okay to let your emotions out and that all emotions serve a purpose is the main thing. If that doesn’t work I suggest a rage room 😂, they are a great release for bottles up emotions. You can always message me if you need to chat.

I had a very messy and traumatic breakup when I was about 17. It triggered one of my most severe episodes of psychosis. It hurt like hell, and took years to get over it. But the relationship was not good for me and in retrospect I'm thankful he broke up with me.

I opened the app and it was like you were writing my story as well. Almost 4 years together, poly, two others are still there, they haven't cared to talk or work on anything. I don't think BPD caused this. I think sometimes people are just not right for one another as partners and that is ok. I am hurting, and up and down as well. But I have hope that one day at a time, things will get better.

You're OK.. dear, just normal feelings after all you've been through..breaking up is hard to do..and you have mind issues as well..you are doing so well to use this app..it is important to talk..about it, about you and how you're thinking n feeling..you are letting out your feelings in a controlled manner..well done ✔️ and you've explained the situation clearly..its my first night on the app too..just found out about it..so glad it's here..lm from Australia lm a counsellor..and have been through 2 marriage breakups and now a death of my beautiful spouse.of 27 years..its hard to bear..but this is how lm coping.l use a combo of herbs..hops, Valerian n skullcap and passionflower I Journal my thoughts n feelings..usually daily..l try n stay very positive..and know the rule for mental health is.. Settle for disorder In the little things, for the sake of order in the greater things..and therefore be content to be discontent in many things..Grows mental health

I've only ever had one romantic relationship. After it ended I started pushing everyone away and looking for reasons to put them out of my life. It was a subconscious choice I made for a long time. But after spending 90% of my time alone retrospect became 20/20 and I realize that the reason I'm alone is because something inside me prefers it over being hurt again. It's not healthy it's very detrimental. No matter the situation when you love someone and you lose them it's painful. I can't relate entirely to your situation but I can speak on loneliness. Feeling alone living with BPD it's scary it's depressing. My only advice is to actively check in with yourself daily and if you end up spending 24 hours without talking to anyone reach out to someone about anything it doesn't have to be explaining to them that you're mental health is suffering and it can just be a conversation about the whether or some other trivial thing. Just don't let yourself get to the point of having no one. You might not think you're pushing people away you might not want to be pushing people away but subconsciously that's what tends to happen. Our brains don't want us to feel negative emotions, so they become trained to avoid circumstances that might trigger pain. You don't have to take this advice but I will say that I wish someone had given it to me. Feel free to reach out and chat with me whenever you like I'm always here to talk or listen.