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Typicaldeepgenz

463d

Bpd makes relationships so difficult and I can't help but be upset at the fact that im 21 in my prime, young but still. With all the romance books and my friends in relationship I can't help the feeling I get when I realise I can't have that. Maybe not forever but for now I can't . I would be toxic in a relationship and I have been becuase I split to often but I. Just want someone to care for me and someone to cuddle with and know I'm safe

Top reply
    • calamarinis

      445d

      I understand that. Me and my ex gf broke up after a year and a half because it had gotten really toxic and I couldn't control how extreme I felt. But while we were dating I never wanted to leave them or them leave me because I thought they were my end all be all. It's scary but sometimes it's best to go your own way and make sure you're okay mentally.

    • calamarinis

      445d

      I understand that. Me and my ex gf broke up after a year and a half because it had gotten really toxic and I couldn't control how extreme I felt. But while we were dating I never wanted to leave them or them leave me because I thought they were my end all be all. It's scary but sometimes it's best to go your own way and make sure you're okay mentally.

    • truepeace971

      456d

      Something I have developed as a strategy to combat splitting is challenging my thoughts. I examine what I am thinking and/or saying and ask myself "Is there any concrete real world evidence of what I am thinking?" Splitting, as I understand it, comes from our inability to hold two dissonant thoughts simultaneously, essentially leading to "black or white"/ "All good or All bad" thinking. When we begin to challenge this notion, we can sometimes gain insight into why we are in a split and how best to proceed.

    • Ashcookie

      457d

      I get where you're going through my relationships with friends aren't the best either it's I want them to stay but at the same time I self isolate at times and want them to go away. It's hard because I feel I don't have connections with people anymore.

    • Maddie6

      462d

      I’m lucky to be with someone who is very accommodating toward me with my BPD symptoms. He has been so supportive and has done so much research on the condition so that he can better help and understand me. I feel so lucky to have found someone like this I feel like it might be a little rare

    • Scarletteve

      462d

      I have bpd and so does my sister and there is definitely hope! I’ve been through so many relationships where I’ve split and it’s gone horribly wrong. DBT and medication has helped me manage it and my sister has now been in a relationship for over 6 years and I’ve been with my boyfriend for over a year now. Just don’t give up hope and work on your mental health as best you can. Remember that you have loads of time ahead of you to get better and find someone

      • Typicaldeepgenz

        462d

        @Scarletteve yeah splitting has ruined my partners lives so much and my own which I'm too blame for . I haven't tried DBT purely becuase it's really hard to find some where I live but I'll have a look again and congrats to u both that's amaizng to see I'm and I'm so glad u both are doing better . And yeah that's true I'll remember that

    • Gingeralamode

      462d

      We deserve love just like everyone else. Remember that as you try to find enjoyment on your own :)

      • Typicaldeepgenz

        462d

        @Gingeralamode thank you I will try and do I generally prefer my own company so I'm already halfway there haha

    • zerochan

      462d

      agreed, all my relationships have been a wreck and it was hard to accept it was caused by me. i got lucky and ended up with someone who legitimately loved and was more than willing to work with me, but i still managed to screw it up lol. the splitting and all of that feels like a curse tbh, i would give everything to wake up one day and just be different

    • Kitten360

      463d

      I completely understand this feeling I'm 23 and I just broke up with someone because my needs weren't being met and I couldn't tell if my needs were too much or if they weren't putting in enough effort. Which turned into toxic fighting all the time

      • Typicaldeepgenz

        462d

        @Kitten360 yeah I'm sorry that happened to u it's awful bad I relate to much. The most healthy people often turn toxic when I'm with them and I don't know if it's me or them so I understand try and not blame yourself though

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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