Dealing with Severe Anxiety and Irrational Fears

I have severe anxiety. So severe my own psychiatrist said she hadn’t seen anything as high as my anxiety. (Took the PAI) my anxiety and autism unfortunately don’t go hand in hand. Usually when I get an anxiety attack it turns Into a meltdown because my brain can’t process all of the emotions with it. Recently I had this big spider crawl across my bed and it scared me. I have an irrational fear of bugs. I’m not scared of spiders unless they are big and this one definitely was. I was sobbing because I couldn’t get back into my room and my mom did what she usually does and tell me to get over it and grow up. I love her but sometimes she makes it worse. I wish I could get over it I wish my anxiety would just go away. It seems I’m always consumed by this cloud of fear that I can’t escape from. I want to not be afraid for a change.