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Keisha

351d

my anxiety embarrasses me. tremendously. i am diagnosed with severe gad and hypochondriasis. both suddenly took a nose dive last year, i’m at the bottom of the barrel. i have at least one panic attack a day, one of which landed me in the emergency room because i thought i was having a heart attack. the stress has my hair falling out. i’m constantly catasrophizing every single minor pain or discomfort i feel. for example, right now i’ve been dealing with a sour stomach with dull pain for a few days along with menstrual cramps. i completely convinced myself i have cancer. i’ve taken my clonazepam now, and i realize how irrational i was. it doesn’t stop the impending doom i feel, it doesn’t stop the weird sensations overtaking my body like a gas lit rag catching on fire. the only thing i’ve found that helps me, is running to my mom. she’s not the most comforting or affectionate person, she’s more logical. she’s neurotypical and has never dealt with severe mental health issues. i can tell she tries to understand me, but it’s hard for her. it’s so embarrassing how needy i am when i’m anxious, and how i take up the time of my pcp (and once in a blue moon, er nurses) to reassure me that i’m not dying. i hope one day, i won’t need all of this. the medicine, the constant reassurance. i want nothing more than peace.

Top reply
    • 55isMe

      117d

      Sorry, I'm like your Mom. Limited understanding. From a technical standpoint, every study that I've seen, exercise helps almost every physical ailment (body and mind). Dont go excessive, almost sporatic excessive is sometimes helpful.

    • 55isMe

      117d

      Sorry, I'm like your Mom. Limited understanding. From a technical standpoint, every study that I've seen, exercise helps almost every physical ailment (body and mind). Dont go excessive, almost sporatic excessive is sometimes helpful.

    • KRAC

      211d

      My heart goes out to you, I am 29 years old and still run to my Mom. I also have a Husband I can run to now though. There are people who will love you regardless. You’re not childish!! You have a disorder, that most cannot fathom dealing with. You know that makes you a warrior right?? Because this crap would knock neurotypicals to their knees. I’m literally crying because you reminded me of me. I’ll pray for your peace and my own. Thank you, for being vulnerable and sharing. I needed to read this.

      • KRAC

        211d

        @KRAC Also, have you heard of or tried CBT therapy?? There are interactive books you can order, and study. There is one meant to help you over 7 weeks, learn to control your (ANTZ) or Automatic Negative Thoughts and therefore how to gain some more control over the anxiety. I hope this helps. The book is on Amazon, I can’t think of the name.

    • Yumeno

      252d

      Hey there, I know this is from 3 months ago but how are you doing now? Any improvements? I can relate to pretty much everything you said (ER visit where I thought I had a heart attack, catastrophizing sensations, having parents who don't fully understand). I get some comfort when I write down positive affirmations for myself. I also try to listen to reassuring audios. I haven't found anything specifically geared towards health anxiety yet but I just listen to guided meditation audios or music with positive messages. Definitely not a "cure" but just trying to keep myself afloat and not let the anxiety win. Hope you've been doing okay, take care. 💜

      • Keisha

        211d

        @Yumeno 4 months now, i’m doing a lot better at the moment. i’m starting to think more rationally and my panic attacks don’t scare me as much. thank you so much 🩷

    • Keisha

      350d

      bump

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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