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Struggling with BPD, Depression, Anxiety, and Bipolar: Need Advice on Overspending

poodlelover28

710d

Hi, just here to vent since I'm new to this app. I have BPD, depression, anxiety, and bipolar. My mom and I haven't spoke in two days and it's hurting my feelings. She can be very toxic. Last we spoke, we got into another argument about money again. I have a tendency to overspend badly and I blew through $2,000. I asked her for $50 just to put gas in my car and she guilt tripped me per usual, saying she gives me thousands of dollars. I do ask for help often but I'm only 23 and making only $2 above minimum wage. I'm getting into my career soon and about to make lots of money, but it just hurts in the meantime that she guilt trips me and makes me feel like crap when I clearly need help financially and mentally. She brings me to tears all the time with these arguments over money. I'm trying my hardest. I'm in therapy but I can't get my spending problem under control. Does anyone else have a spending problem? How did you get it under control?

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Anxiety (Including GAD)

Depression

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)

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    • Teags5

      260d

      I'm sorry you're mum isn't more understanding. Mine is the same. I lost a friend at work on Monday, so a few of us took the day off and had drinks. My mum just had a go at me for being irresponsible. It sux when they don't go through the same things and just don't understand. I find sometimes I try not to talk about too much with her tht she doesn't agree on and just vent to my friends. With the money, could you separate it and put it in envelopes and write what it's for? That way if you go to take the money out, you know you won't have it for the particular thing, like fuel etc?

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    • Teags5

      260d

      I'm sorry you're mum isn't more understanding. Mine is the same. I lost a friend at work on Monday, so a few of us took the day off and had drinks. My mum just had a go at me for being irresponsible. It sux when they don't go through the same things and just don't understand. I find sometimes I try not to talk about too much with her tht she doesn't agree on and just vent to my friends. With the money, could you separate it and put it in envelopes and write what it's for? That way if you go to take the money out, you know you won't have it for the particular thing, like fuel etc?

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    • livvie361

      701d

      I would try to budget your money better, like write out a plan of what you need to spend money on. I know if you're manic it's hard but it's not impossible. Your mom shouldn't guilt trip you but you should also be thankful she helps at all. My parents haven't helped me out for years unless it dealt with me going to visit them.

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    • clova

      701d

      Awww hunny you just only think of what you need before wants mostly thats what I try to do i like to binge eat.. and I haven't been doing that for two days now but at the same time I feel not great about not eating as mush as I usually do but when it comes to money im not great with it so I but it in my wallet then put that in my little purse and then put it in my small backpack which I put in a big backpack so that I think about it before I even get to the wallet. Sometimes it works for me sometimes not but uhm another way is if your money is on a card most people have to see it in cash to see that they don't have much sometimes like for me I need like NEED it in cash or I will spend it like itd nothingness it helps me see that like oh I have 50 dollars left maybe save that for gas or oh I have 200 save that for a bill like I like to see cash for that reason alone I know some people have a wallet book where you can write what your saving the money for and you put the money in there so u don't use it till you need it or you use it for what u saved for.

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      • poodlelover28

        701d

        @clova thank you so much! I've tried the cash trick before but my spending problem is so severe that even if I see the cash it doesn't work for me. I tried to stick to a plan of if I only have $150 left it strictly goes to gas and groceries NOT food out but its not going so well so far. I really need to talk to my therapist about this for sure!

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        • clova

          701d

          @poodlelover28 savings account that you can't open

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☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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