Confused and Hurting: Seeking Advice on My Mental Health Struggles

I don't know what to think right now. Maybe you can help? Even just relate a little? I am a 24 year old daughter living with her parents. I have been mentally disabled in so many ways combined since childhood, and it's only gotten worse over time. I have never been out of therapy for more than 6 months over the last 10 years, and I can hardly contribute anything to the family apart from being a good listener. I have cost my parents so much, and hurt my siblings with episodes of dissociation... Now as I turn 25 in a couple weeks, I am seeing how much more I will cost everyone, specifically my parents. in a year, I will age out of their insurance and no longer afford my doctors, tests, or medications. Dad thinks I can just get better physically, and the mental will follow. That isn't the case though, I've tried for years. He doesn't realise how much he hurts me when he insists that, and tells me my DBT and CBT work isn't actually me working. Mom is getting to an overwhelmed point where she can't even listen a little to questions or any realizations, and she has been the person who understands. I'm trying to figure out if I'm actually being spoiled, or if that's just my depression and anxiety talking. The CPTSD loves taking that thought further too, and then PNES acts up. What to do, what to do... Do I continue trying to work in normal or adjacent areas and hold down a job? How much am I willing to overtax my mind and body before relenting and asking for true disability help? ... How jaded will I be by the end of this...? Am I actually disabled because of this constant fear of letting others down in less than 2 months like usual? Or of facing the people that silently fired me because I got deathly ill and refused my phone calls to explain? How do I get away from this life I'm simply surviving in in order to live, not using extreme measures? I'm confused, and hurting, and being told I have strength where I find little. I have a mind, but it's tormented with my conditions. Further tormented by being stuck in my family's home and able to do nothing, or improve the situation. I understand how lucky I am to have a roof and base necessities, but I feel trapped. And this trap comes with a deadline to get substantial help or succeed in areas I've not been able to, not for lack of trying, or it becomes something worse. Being numb is the only way I can think about solutions without breaking down into panic attacks and depressive months and seizures. I wonder how much I'm doing right and wrong by not applying for SSDI for a while yet as I force myself to try harder to work conventionally like others want me to. And am I dooming myself to a period where I have no access to medications and doctors I need when my father's insurance kicks me off?