Struggling with Mental Health and Seeking Advice

It sucks to hear that you're going through so much. I understand your distrust with therapist and psychs. My sister once told me that it takes time to find the right therapist or psych that fits with you. It's like choosing a lifetime partner. I have days where I wish I was just dead but I have 2 kids to think about. I'm scared if I tell a therapist that, they may admit me to a psych ward or something. And I feel like they say what they were taught in books to say. I want to talk to someone who's been in my shoes and can understand exactly how I'm feeling. As far as meds. I've been dealing with anxiety and panic attacks for over 16 years untreated. I was afraid of taking meds. I have an older sister who was the same. She got so tired of her anxiety destroying her life so she jumped and got the meds. It's been a year and her life is SO much better. I finally took the plunge a month ago and took the meds. She told me if I had diabetes I would take metformin so why not take a med to help with your anxiety? And I know the feeling of not wanting to fight anymore. People don't understand how hard it is. Just driving to the store is a HUGE battle for me. We're fighting so much on the inside it's so freaking exhausting. But what helped me is finding someone who is going through what I'm going through and we talk and vent to each other and the fight doesn't feel so hard anymore. I hope you find your way and you get even a little better and create more steps for you to keep getting better. You're not alone. There are so many people fighting mental health and we're all in this together. I hope this helps. ❤️