So it's obviously extremely common to be horrified at the idea of being abandoned. I've had my fair share of needing validation to ensure I'm still okay for people to talk with.
But does anyone try to abandon others before they're abandoned themselves? I've also had my fair share of this. Blocking someone, avoiding their messages, becoming short/annoyed with them, slowly pushing away, etc. It's so strange considering how I'm afraid of having nobody, but sometimes I just feel like me being quiet and unavailable is easier.
This is actually really common. Most of us have an anxious attachment system. Itās very typical for us to āhurt/abandon others before they can do it to usā. Check out the book Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help YouFind - and Keep - Love https://a.co/j5gmuhJ
I find I āabandon othersā or atleast think I am by not texting them or something for a few hours. But ALWAYS cave in after a few hours. Guess itās how I cry for help? š
100%
When my BPD was at its worse I was isolating and pushing others away based on the fear that they would eventually leave anyway.
If you havenāt yet, I highly suggest DBT !! Itās a lot of work and itās intense, but it made such a difference in my life
I did this with my fiance when we first started seeing each other. I have always had people leave me, so I kept telling him he would eventually leave me or I would hurt him in some way. He continued to tell me that he isnt going to run. It was really hard to build trust, but it eventually came.
ā This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision
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Leebit
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So it's obviously extremely common to be horrified at the idea of being abandoned. I've had my fair share of needing validation to ensure I'm still okay for people to talk with.
But does anyone try to abandon others before they're abandoned themselves? I've also had my fair share of this. Blocking someone, avoiding their messages, becoming short/annoyed with them, slowly pushing away, etc. It's so strange considering how I'm afraid of having nobody, but sometimes I just feel like me being quiet and unavailable is easier.
I like being alone but I hate being lonely. Like wth. š©
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Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
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ā This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision