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Struggling to Make Friends

pfunkie

427d

I woke up not in the best headspace. I keep trying to make friends with the people I work with. It's always been like this in my life. Where people are like yeah she's so great, she's so funny, but then no one ever wants to hang out with me. It really has taken a toll on me over the years. I'm this awesome funny person but not awesome and funny enough to actually hangout with outside of a formal setting. I tried to ask the people in my life co workers and online friends who live near by if they wanted to go to a concert with me. A concert I would have paid for thier tickets no questions asked just because I want to just experience screaming our lungs out and the midnight air while we put our heads out the window laughing blaring music. That's all I want. Just good memories. But no one wants to go. The only time people want to hang out with me is when they want something from me. They never want just me. They don't see me first they see a woman, sometimes an object. I just want to be seen and heard and experienced...and I just want friends. I keep trying to convince myself that maybe I'm not meant to have friends rn. But this isolation its hurting me. And I don't know what to do...

4

7

7

Anxiety (Including GAD)

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)

Depression

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Top reply
    • Annie24

      427d

      Have you heard of “doing life together?” I ask because I’ve found the most successful ways to hang out with people are by going grocery shopping together or some other task that needs done, together. Makes it more enjoyable for everybody, less stressful, and no guilt about feeling unproductive

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    • SkylerRose

      427d

      Same. The Internet is the new culture; and from COVID everyone is used to being inside and apparently social anxiety is a huge thing now. It's not that no one wants to, everyone just doesn't like to step foot outside anymore... It's the new norm for the last 2 generations 🫤 I would just start enjoying yourself more, take care of yourself better, and start a in depth healing path.

      1

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    • Abby0427

      427d

      I have felt like this too for as long as I could remember. I don’t think I could truly call anyone my best friend other than one that moved away that I don’t see anymore.

      1

      Reply
    • Annie24

      427d

      Have you heard of “doing life together?” I ask because I’ve found the most successful ways to hang out with people are by going grocery shopping together or some other task that needs done, together. Makes it more enjoyable for everybody, less stressful, and no guilt about feeling unproductive

      4

      Reply
      • 4byfour

        427d

        @Annie24 I agree, I actually heard from a penpal in Brazil that this is a common way she hangs out with people! Plus, it’s a great way for both parties to learn to ‘use’ each other in ways that stay simple and independent

        1

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    • Annie24

      427d

      Wow this was so very very heartfelt and I so relate. My heart hurts reading this. Idk what it is about becoming an adult, but it seems like people just get so caught up in themselves and their own lives that friends don’t hold the same weight they did back in high school and early years. Maybe keep asking? I have had to ask many times at work, but I need to remind myself not to pester too much lol. I have found if I ask what kinds of things they are interested in and are already doing—then it’s easy enough just to ask to tag along. That way they don’t need to add ANOTHER thing to their busy schedule.

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    • SuicideShrimp

      427d

      I feel this exact thing everyday … if I don’t message my “best friend” first she never talks to me I see her hangout with all these other people and having fun without me not inviting me to anything I haven’t seen her in like a month now and it just feels like if I don’t put in effort we wouldn’t even be friends it’s sucks she won’t even respond to my messages half the time :(

      2

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    • Rainberries

      427d

      I struggle with loneliness as well. That was a really nice gesture of you. Maybe they are just not the right people for that particular thing. It's hard to meet people nowadays.

      2

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☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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