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Redlights

709d

I love to make friends yet as I get older I find it harder to find people who are like me or just able to stay around long enough. They always talk to me like friends but once they are done with me they stop and just look at me with disgust.

Top reply
    • WRaven

      704d

      I get that, I want to make friends but Ive been so quiet for so many years that now that Im willing to try to speak no one really wants to talk to me. other only talk to me when they need help or somthing, and they stop talking when neither of us really need eachother.

    • WRaven

      704d

      I get that, I want to make friends but Ive been so quiet for so many years that now that Im willing to try to speak no one really wants to talk to me. other only talk to me when they need help or somthing, and they stop talking when neither of us really need eachother.

    • Munch

      707d

      Keeping relationships going is my problem. I have good days and bad. During the bad days, I retreat into myself and don’t engage. It’s hard to find people that will be okay with that.

      • Redlights

        707d

        @Munch yeah I do that often cause I get ashamed and paranoid that people consistently are saying stuff about me.

        • Primm

          707d

          @Redlights Usually you have to find people who actually know what's it like. I have friends who will ghost me for days or weeks or months at a time but I dont mind at all because I understand the pain someone can be in. There are also types of friends. We only have one word for friend but a friend can serve a lot of roles in someone's life that can be very shallow or very intimate. If you feel like someone isn't serving a role for you or you aren't serving a role for them then forcing a relationship will go wrong. You shouldn't feel pressured in a friendship especially early on. Usually that means working on your own insecurities and and confidence. And people really need to be honest with each other, don't lie or hide things from your friends unless it's super super serious. Always try to tell the truth even if it seems rude, boring, off-topic, selfish, or immoral. That's how you quickly find the people you can actually get close to. When people first meet, they show you incomplete and idealized versions of themselves. You have to always keep that in mind and ask yourself "if this person was worse... if this person was lying... if this person was problematic... would I still like them and support them?" And if the answer is usually no then you should probably move on because that person deserves better (and you deserve a person who you can like more easily). In my opinion, you have have be ready to be a good friend if you want one back. And in my opinion, being a good friend is about providing value and support to someone's life and truly caring about that person's well being and happiness. Idk if that helps but I felt like writing a lot. If you want to be friends let me know but I only use discord or sms. < 3

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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