Why I Don't Trust Anyone

I feel that so much, I've always kept a sma social circle as well, mainly due to the fear that everyone will die/leave unexpectedly, but I have learned that the greatest friends and/or love interests will often come to you first if you are open and accepting to a conversation. Sometimes simply smiling as you walk past someone will encourage them to talk to you, thus initiating a friendship that they sincerely want to build.

I totally understand where you are coming from. Just try not to make your walls too high or too firm. Someday you will find someone who is worth the risk of letting them in. But, in the meantime, try to have some flexibility so you don't miss a potential best friend.

I'm awful sorry to hear you're going through this too. So I don't have to tell you it sucks. I wish I could give you a hug, (unless you're a person who doesn't like to be touched ofc) but know you're not alone. I'm in the same boat.