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jay_

878d

this isn’t necessarily about me but I really need some help here my boyfriend has been going through depressive episodes and it’s been really tough for me trying to help him out of them or help him feel better/comfort him, and even more so because we’re long distance at the moment i’m at a loss and I really don’t know what to do to help him sometimes. any advice?

Top reply
    • Oooouuuucchh

      878d

      Find out what his love language is, and try to do your best to give him that. Gifts? Send him things. Time? FaceTime dates. Physical touch? Send him one of your sweaters or a soft blanket that smells like you, etc.

    • jay_

      878d

      that’s so sweet thank you so much😭 he’s had some very bad memories due to therapy but I think I may bring it up again just to see if he would be willing to try again. his family is great but also filled with medical problems between both of his brothers, himself, and his mom, so they don’t really talk about mental health much, unfortunately. i’m moving in with him beginning of august and we’re both really looking forward to that! I thrive a lot on contact and that’s the best way I know how to comfort and reassure people and I know he likes to be able to be with me/have me there as well, so I hope i’ll be able to help him better in times like this. thank you very much🥺<33

    • SpoonieZone

      878d

      Your boyfriend is lucky to have you and I’m glad that he has you too as depression is difficult in itself but having a partner who loves you unconditionally is a blessing in itself. It’s also a difficult thing for the partner as you know. One thing is that you cannot blame yourself or make his happiness your responsibility. This isn’t exactly healthy for your well being either. Not sure what steps your boyfriend has taken or is doing to help himself but therapy, eliminating toxic environments and doing what makes him happy helps a lot. Eating right and communicating with supportive people whether it be a loved one or a therapist. Does he have anyone where he lives that can check on him or he can talk with? Do you plan to end having a long distance relationship and be closer to each other? Sometimes people thrive on human contact. Maybe changing things up could help. It really all depends. Wishing you both the very best 🤗

    • jay_

      878d

      thank you guys for your input and advice, I do my best for his love language and do send him gifts and we facetime/go on discord and play games or watch movies all the time, i just really struggle in helping him in the moment when things are very bad

    • rj.crow

      878d

      I had an almost identical situation not too long ago. My boyfriend said that fact that I was there and told him if he needed anything he could tell me helped. I also recommend teletherapy and that helped a lot because he wasn’t leaving the house.

    • Oooouuuucchh

      878d

      Find out what his love language is, and try to do your best to give him that. Gifts? Send him things. Time? FaceTime dates. Physical touch? Send him one of your sweaters or a soft blanket that smells like you, etc.

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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