Struggling with Abortion Trauma: Seeking Support

I've never had a pregnancy or abortion myself, but from my experience I understand a bit of what you're describing. I've always known I didn't want to give birth, mainly due to the physical changes and pain, then eventually because of dysphoria and mental health concerns. Periods were always awful for many reasons, so I'm glad that I don't have them anymore as well. I don't think it's abnormal to have a wide range of complicated and difficult emotions around abortion. There is so much stigma and misinformation, and even knowing that things aren't true doesn't keep them from affecting you. Then there is the fact that your body underwent drastic hormone changes very quickly, and that shock can cause postpartum-like disorders. I would recommend reaching out to nearby organizations to see if you can find a place for non-judgmental counseling focusing on postpartum and miscarriages.