Struggling to Cry After Loss

Depression usually leaves me feeling super numb. Also if you take anti depressants this could be a sign they aren't working right. I changed mine recently and before I went off of the old medication I couldn't cry, even while completely alone and trying to cry with a sad movie. When I went off of it I started being able to cry when things were even kind of sad because it was like finally letting things out. TLDR check your meds with your doctor

It has been 15 years since my mom passed and 3 years since my brother passed. I have not cried and I tend to hold things in. I know it's not a good thing to do but that's what I was taught to do. Anyway I just want to let it out but it's really hard for me to show my soft side.

Also, I'm sorry for your loss. I didn't lose a close family member, I couldn't imagine what that would be like. God be with you and your loved ones 🤍

I find it hard to explain myself. Especially when I’m upset. I usually go back later to whoever and explain when I’m calmer.

It takes bringing up deep emotional pains from childhood to make me cry anymore

I know it's hard to feel this way. I have been feeling the same way for many years. I'm going to be 45 next week and I have been feeling like that since I was about 7 years old due to some very traumatic experience. Until this year I let things build up inside me with no release and I had shut down my emotions. I have learned that I had not gone through the grieving process for all the difficult experiences in my life. The last few years have been very hard to get through but also a very learning experience with all the things I have been through.

I lost someone about 12 years ago. Grief goes through different stages and it's not always straightforward. The numbness is probably you being overwhelmed. I know it can make you feel guilty, like somehow you love them less because you're not physically feeling sadness. But that's just not true. If anything, the fact that you're overwhelmed means that he meant a lot to you. (As far as I understand) it likely means that your body is overwhelmed, and doesn't know how to process it properly right now. Having someone to talk to about your loss, someone who didn't know him might help. From what I've learned, learning to live with the loss of someone close to you is a gradual process. It's not that their memory fades away, or that it completely stops hurting. But as we begin to unpack our feelings about the situation, one bit at a time. Usually it helps by through talking it through with someone else. Therapy can really help if you have any available to you. But allowing yourself to feel whatever comes up without blaming yourself for how you feel is another way that can help. (But be kind and gentle with yourself. Putting pressure on a bruise only makes it worse, the same applies here.) But the more you gradually unpack it, the less and less overwhelming everything will be over time. And the more that blurry numbness starts to come back into focus again, and you'll be able to see and feel the difference between your different emotions more easily again. I like to think about it like your emotions are overwhelmed and overlapping. At least that's what I felt like was happening in my case. And I know that most people don't like hearing it. But when I found Jesus, that's when I started healing so much more fully ✝️ And while Jesus is so much more than someone who can help us with our struggles. Any reason for coming to Jesus is worth it. Anyway, hope this helps somewhat. There's nothing wrong with you, it's perfectly normal, even though it doesn't feel like it. God bless you and yours 🤍✝️🕊

Wish I could help, that's not smthng I've run into, at least not yet. Best advice I can think of is talk to good friends, & anyone else you feel close to & comfortable with, & things may gradually start to open up. Best of luck 🤞