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MatchaBunn

770d

I can’t tell what is causing my inability to feel connected to others; is it depression coming back? Or is it just my autistic brain preferring to be alone and doing the same things over and over for comfort? My ADHD brain driven by interest/having a hyperfixations that doesn’t involve people? Or is it burnout and exhaustion? A mixture of a lot of things? Whatever it is, I’d love to be able to figure out what makes it so hard for me to focus on others. I guess other people just like, start talking with people and asking about how they’re doing? Make plans? While I feel like all I can think about most of the time is taking care of myself and mitigating my health issues. It’s just not realistic to me to know how to be a regular person in that way. No one ever really taught me. I feel so trapped and overwhelmed by my conditions sometimes.

    • kiwi.maddog

      770d

      I rarely ever feel a connection with anyone including family and close friends. It is indescribable. I'm not sure what it is.

      • MatchaBunn

        770d

        @kiwi.maddog it’s a comfort to know that I’m not alone in this, and that it can be understood. There is still a lot of sadness there tho, and I am hoping that as I grow I learn how to really open up and rely on others. Sometimes I feel like I always hit this road block in my mood where I need to be left alone, but then I don’t know when to stop being alone. I contribute that to autistic inertia, where once I’m doing one thing it takes a lot of energy and effort to switch.

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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