Realizing the Dark Truth of My Childhood

🙏 I came from a large blended family. I was "abused" by my uncle at 5 yrs old. Raped by two men at age 16. One got me pregnant and I raised him myself. I was a young single mom trying to make it on my own. My step father was physically abusive to all my brothers and me. He never scolded his own children (he had five). My step family was mean and his kids bullied us, stole from us, lied to us, give me alcohol and then tell my stepdad and I would get beat again. Now though, we have all grown up and most of us get along finally. I speak to all my family still, but some of my family still hates each other. That's messed up right there!

I've come to realize that i could've been either kidnapped, killed or mugged when i was a kid... short answer, yes...

I definitely didn't realize how messed up my childhood was until like about 3 years ago and I only realized it because a friend of mine pointed out that I should not have to be wearing a hoodie in August to school to cover up bruises that My adoptive mother left behind

It’s so incredibly hard to admit when it was messed up when you love your family so much. But mine was. It is definitely why it is hard for me to trust and not feel like I’m being used or that I won’t end up alone. Unfortunately I am 1 out of 8 kids and at least 6 of us will not have easy lives. But we push through because there is a point to succeeding and making sure our futures aren’t the same.

I just assumed my childhood was normal before realizing how all that was horrible and that other "good" families weren't like mine. I always thought that show TV parents were horribly unrealistic until I made a friend who has a very stable and kind home life as a teenager.

Yep. I didn't know until I was almost 30. Abuse was normal for me so I thought all families were like mine. What made it worse was my friends' parents were just like my abusive parents so I thought everyone was like that. It's been two years since I got away from them and I already know I'll never get to a point where I don't need therapy and I don't have nightmares about them. Add to that, I live with my brother and he's just as abusive as they are. I'm hoping my other sib and I can be away from him by very early next year. So I can finally start to heal and live my life.