Joie

113d

I'm going on a rant really quick...

I feel like "I'm too heavy to hold" lyrics I recently found that explain how I feel on a daily basis. People tell me all the time that I'm too emotional, that I take things too personally. That basically how I operate as a human being is wrong and makes other uncomfortable.

My mom walks into my house and the first thing she does is critiques my house or ask what's wrong with me because it's so messy. My friends rarely ever call or text, even though I make an effort to contact them.

I have a three year old that's amazing but overwhelms me. I get sad knowing that he won't pick up good habits unless I teach him, but I'm depressed and sometimes can't bring myself to do a whole lot within a day. All of my energy goes into my child and I usually don't have much energy left for myself.

I moved far away from my friends to get help with my kid from my family. But I often feel that was a bad move because my family and I are enablers when we're together. There's love and support, but also judgement.

Plus my friends and I used to hug, my family are not huggers. I miss the connections.

The friggin pandemic made me become antisocial and I gained weight and I can't seem to find my way back to a life with friends.

Just very isolated and lonely without a ton of options for change.

Depression

Postpartum Depression (PPD)

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  • TexAss

    108d

    Find some mommy groups near you. Checking into your local homeschooling groups is also a great place to meet more people going through the same things as you. I'm in a similar but opposite scenario. Moved with my husband towards his family support and they ended up being not supportive. Nearly 20 years into our marriage I find out they weren't supportive of our union from the beginning. It's a hard thing to get up in the morning for being in a completely different state than where I grew up. All the people around here either love him or hate him and neither of those facts are helping me find friends. :/ One thing to look forward to in the future, no matter where you find yourself, children do grow up and become more helpful and less a screaming tornado. Set routines, play games at cleanup times (I like encouraging "shooting baskets" with the toys when putting them away, or time trials before a fun activity to make it go quicker), and stay on your routines as much as you pleasantly can. Routines can frustrated me, so I consciously decide when it's okay to skip a day or slack a week (everyone needs a vacation sometimes) and try to focus on the worst clutter around my house to bring me back into work after the break. When my kids started to see my routines and their involvement in the mess and cleanup they stopped making the messes. Keep your spirits up!

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