My Best Friend Doesn't Want to Live with Me Because of My Depression

A friend is supposed to support you when you are going through a hard time if she is not willing to do that then you should find a new friend who is. Maybe you should try surrounding yourself with a group of positive supportive people.

Sorry to hear Bari. A lot of people don't understand how complicated depression is. It's understandable that it freaks her out...she doesn't understand it. It leads to a lot of misunderstandings, especially when people grow up with the belief that if something is wrong with someone that they'll get better. The problem with depression is that it doesn't necessarily go away and can be a lifetime condition. Most people don't know how handle someone with lifetime conditions. Rejection is a part of life. What's important to note is that it may not be for the reasons you believe it to be. I recall jumping from A to Z when my depression was very severe. But if you hear hoofsteps behind you, think of horses not unicorns. In other words, don't assume the worst. She probably has her reasons. Or maybe she doesn't. We don't know. Learn QTIP. Quit Taking It Personally. It has helped me a lot in understanding that the majority of things are not related to me...even if it feels like it. I hope this helped.

I think these comments are well meaning but with so little context their fervor should be taken with a grain of salt. validation is important but mental health is a balancing act and your goal should neither be to cling on to any relationship because you have tied your self worth to it nor to torpedo healthy relationships because the other person made a decision that hurt you. you asked for advice so i am going to try to give some based on what you said, but first i do want to make it clear that that is a tough situation to be in and im sorry that you are hurting. I don't have all the details on your specific situation but i think it can help for you to imagine the situation as though it were 2 different people you love and care about. one is struggling with depression and doing there best the other is that persons friend and cares about them very much but is still a person with their own needs and stresses. would you blame that person (your friend) for making a difficulty decision to look after their own mental health? sometimes depression can feel like drowning and you are just struggling so much just to remain barely above water. often an untrained person attempting to aid the drowning person will be drowned as well because even though they may be a good swimmer, they are not trained to save people. The best thing to do then is to get a lifeguard. If this hypothetical is relatable then i would give some thought to trying to understand your friends perspective and not beating yourself up. neither of you are to blame and we should encourage the people we love and care about to care for themselves. And you should also not take that as an excuse to guilt or shame yourself, you are trying very hard to survive and you took a good step by reaching out to try and find a support system by using this app. also, cognitive behavioral therapy is real good stuff and if finding a therapist is too stressful or expensive start small by just looking up videos about CBT techniques.

If she does not want to be around and support you while you are fighting depression then she is a bad friend.

The people who really love you will accept you for the good and the bad. She probably wouldn’t be a very considerate roommate if that “freaks her out”.

This person sounds like a total coward. If she could not accept you for exactly who you are, then she should not have wasted your time. This has absolutely nothing to do with your value as a person.