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Purplephoenix

824d

Hi all! First post here. I feel like I want more friends but it’s so hard. I’m super friendly and get along well with people but when I’m depressed I withdraw for long periods and lose friends because I’m not responsive or consistent. Sometimes these periods last for months if I’m not taking medication. I enjoy people when I’m not depressed but when I am I feel like everything in my life is a task even texting back. Any one here who can relate?

Top reply
    • Lindsey_Bug

      824d

      Yes! For myself, I don’t want to only talk about my life when I’m in a rut because it’s not who I am. I get reclusive when I don’t have anything positive to say. I find that I text honest, from the heart messages. For example, “I hope you and yours are well. Tell me how you’re doing?” It engages me and redirects my focus off of my anxiety and thoughts that I don’t want onto my loved one/friends. I hope this helps you. 💕 💕 💕

    • anemone

      824d

      yes. i remember being friendly and social once upon a time. but i also have borderline and severe social anxiety that makes talking to anyone but my partner terrifying a lot of the time. i can't remember ever being this low in my life and i am constantly anxious that my best friend, who a few months ago sent me an unprompted message letting me know it was mutual, will tire of me. then again at least half the time i don't want to be here anymore, so i'm not sure it matters. i have lost most of my other friends because i was kicked out of my main group and the remaining few i can't talk to. i'm scared to make new friends because it activates the ptsd from being abruptly cut off from most of the people i knew. at this point i feel mostly like i should cut everyone else left off as well though, to protect them from the disaster i'm becoming. i'm sorry that that isn't especially helpful or encouraging, so here's some advice too: i suggest trying to explain your depression (including that texting back is too tough for you to manage at those times - maybe even that you still read messages, if you do) to your friends at a point when you're not as depressed? they might be more understanding than you realise, and knowing why means they won't feel like they've just been ghosted. i've known people like that before. some people will even send little messages letting you know how theyre doing, things that reminded them of you, funny/cute stuff to make you smile, etc. things that dont make you feel pressured to respond but still let you have some sort of connection until you can. hope that much helps

    • Lindsey_Bug

      824d

      Yes! For myself, I don’t want to only talk about my life when I’m in a rut because it’s not who I am. I get reclusive when I don’t have anything positive to say. I find that I text honest, from the heart messages. For example, “I hope you and yours are well. Tell me how you’re doing?” It engages me and redirects my focus off of my anxiety and thoughts that I don’t want onto my loved one/friends. I hope this helps you. 💕 💕 💕

    • Kid

      824d

      I’m in the same boat!! I absolutely love making friends and being with people, but my depression makes me withdraw and be distant with them. I’ve never struggled in making friends. But I do struggle in maintaining contact and being present with them,

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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