cosmocola

218d

i used to be sober. and now all i can be is irritated that people are worried about me drinking. like leave me alone mf. that's that drinking brain tho ik it is. I'm strugglin man. i wish i had friends who didn't know about my problem

Substance Use Disorder (SUD)

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  • talulabigpants

    218d

    I struggle everyday! I can be here for ya cuz I get it 👍

  • DariaFae

    218d

    Yes the struggle will always be real. But they love and care about you. Trust and believe if I didn't have my daughter scolding me for drinking I'd be alot worse. And for me the more I drink the more I want to do or get drugs and stuff. I have been off of drugs for several years now but still think about them every day... this and that but I know low key it's just the drugs talking and I yell back in my head that that's not me and I don't need them. Yes it will 'help' for a short while bit it's a really bad band-aid that only hurts more in the long run. I still have a major problem spending money though. It used to keep me from getting drugs cause I didn't have the money. And it's kinda the comfort I need sometimes. Amazon addict now. I'm hoping to cut it off this month and bought a bunch of stupid stuff to say good bye. Or that's what I tell myself. It's good to have friends who understands you in every way so they can look put for you even though you don't think you need it... that's typically the substance. I used to get really mad @ my daughter and really yell at her when she got mad @ me. I feel terrible about it and have apologized countless times but it never makes it right. And lol she started acting like my mom @ like 8 and she's only 12 now. She's very independent I have raised her well and she wants the best for me. She only knows of my drinking though. I couldn't hide that.

    • Carriejowow

      199d

      I have 2 daughters 20 and 15 years. They are so not like me when it comes to addiction and I think alot of that has to do with how they seen me feel like crap from pills. Oh man do I feel guilty but they have forgiven me but just haven’t forgiven myself. But I got clean when they were young, very young so they won’t have to grow up with an addict mom. Just a recovering one. I see how caring you are too of your kids and yourself ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

  • Carriejowow

    199d

    Unfortunately I can see both sides and they honestly only do it because they love and care about you. Otherwise most people would even mention it to you if they didn’t care so I guess look at it that way but also I totally understand where you’re coming from two

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