Struggling with the Itch: My Experience with Self-Harm

**CW: Self-harm, scratching** I burned my hands again. It’s been a really long time since I’ve done it. My hands were so itchy. Ever wake up with such a thirst to scratch, that you don’t even have to be awake to scratch? The past couple nights before my period begins, I’ve been waking up to me scratching already. It always flares up around this time. The itch is so intense. My lotion takes 10 minutes to take effect, and even then it only subsides some of the itch. The burn must be gradual. I can’t put my hands in burning water right away. I had time to think it through. But it was just so itchy. And the burn is satisfactory when it stops the itch in the worst parts. For the parts where I couldn’t handle the heat for, stay itchy still, but it hurts to scratch. A double edged sword. Nonetheless, the itch returns. As I write this to wait for the lotion to take effect, I still scratch. The burn effect doesn’t last anyway. And it’s still so itchy.