Feeling like a burden and wanting to be dead

i know it’s tough. what helps me the most when i’m really hating everything is just doing something I like. something fun. it’s not the best coping mechanism but watching youtube or reading manga or webnovels makes me happy. so I indulge because it’s good to be happy. and yes, that’s a big difference. there’s been many times, so so many, where i just wish I wasn’t alive so i wouldn’t have to deal with anything anymore. i just wish i could be not there. but i wouldn’t kill myself. so i think that shows you know it’s not always this bad, that sometimes it’s nice to still be here. so try not to think negative thoughts, and do things you like. it will get better.

It sounds like all the people in your lives are serious jerks. If they can’t treat you well then they don’t deserve you. Do not stick around people who treat you like their burden because you’re not. You are an amazing person who just hasn’t found the right people yet. I know it’s hard but you have to hold out until you find those people who truly love and care for you. And once you find those people, I hope you’re able to perceive yourself the way that they do. I hope you’re able to come to realize your true self-worth. ❤️

there are several good things about you! you care for people, u care for yourself (otherwise u wouldn’t have written your post) and your Gods’s child! Focus on those positive things every day! Every time you say something negative about yourself say three things positive about yourself, until it becomes a habit!

Yeah I feel that for sure, and it sounds terrible but I've just been distracting myself until I eventually get happy. Something that has been helpful is enjoying life because of the people that help make it enjoyable. Like I hate myself and im tired of the everyday monotony, but I love my friends and family, so I put up with it for them. I know everyone doesn't have the best family or friends, but then that's a toxic situation you can do your best to remove yourself from. Friends are great but you shouldn't have to put up with a shitty friend. People are really nice, keep that in mind. Dating is still something a lot of people are struggling with. Don't worry about that too much, just keep trying to talk to people and one will stick around as a lover 😊

I have been where you have been. I know you can’t believe this right now, but I know how you feel. I know how that darkness and self-loathing feels all-consuming and unending. I even tried to take my own life. It did not help at all. I promise you, IT REALLY DOES GET BETTER. I seriously recommend you try to make an appointment with a psychiatrist and psychologist. And also recommend you try and get yourself checked in to an in-patient clinic. They really can make a huge difference in just a few days. Please, keep yourself safe. Stay around people you can trust. Be honest with those in your life. You are worth it. I know all of this is hard to believe when you are so consumed by that darkness, but you are worthy, loved, and necessary on this Earth. You can do this!

Hmm could always work on self love by making of list of all positive aspects of yourself and even if you make a negative list those could be things to work on changing your perspective of. You’re life is definitely worth living and I know you’ll find beauty in it soon enough. Those who treat you like a burden are not those who are worthy of your presence and maybe you should leave and if you can’t leave then make your presence from them as scarce as you can. I know it’s rough right now but if you need to vent I will listen 🖤