Mustard_Yellow

197d

Hello! I have been with my boyfriend for three years and have never questioned if I should be with him or not until this month. I’ve broken up with him twice but came back a few hours later both times. I seem so sure that I can be independent and then when I leave I just wanna be in our home with him. He has forgiven me for putting him through this emotional rollercoaster but I am scared. I know I wanna be with him but my head does not seem to be able to stay screwed on straight. Please help

Anxiety (Including GAD)

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  • VoodooHorizon

    197d

    I have this exact same problem. almost broke up with him 2 years ago, almost broke up with him last year, and them again about a month ago. this is my first serious relationship and I'm terrified that it's not right and that I'm meant to be with someone else. but how do I know? commitment is scary and sometimes I fantasize about being alone again but everytime I leave him I just crave him. I hope we figure it out.

    • Mustard_Yellow

      196d

      same here man thank you

  • OtterRose

    197d

    I’ve recently been diagnosed with dependent anxiety disorder which results in an increased panic at the thought of being alone/partner-less. It has caused ups and downs in my current relationship too. Diagnoses anxiety in general can make relationships just as challenging. Communicating with your partner about your needs and doing your best to explain your anxieties can really help. If communication is lacking do your best to open the doors for an open conversation. It can be really scary and confusing, especially if you aren’t sure what you want. Having an open conversation can help you both figure out what you need. Whether that be to continue the relationship with additional boundaries and/or communication. Or whether that is to end the relationship.

    • Mustard_Yellow

      173d

      thank you very much for this!

  • In_vino_veritas

    196d

    It sounds to me like this relationship has parts for you that are working and those that definitely aren't. My husband and I have been together for 10 years now and we have absolutely had our moments - but the best thing for our relationship was actually quarantine; our relationship got better because the forced prolonged togetherness made us learn to communicate better. Amongst other things, I learned to try to consider his end of things better before getting angry and he learned the importance of listening. Given that you can't exactly invent a quarantine to work on this issue, maybe something like couples therapy could be a good avenue for opening up lines of communication so you can both take a serious look at yourselves, what you have, and whether you see a future together.

    • Mustard_Yellow

      173d

      thank you very much

  • Kitkat0417

    196d

    I do the same thing to my husband. I feel like I'm just being a burden to him. But I have found that communication is what helps me. I let him know that I'm having a not so good day and that I'm stressed or depressed or whatever I may be feeling and most of the time it helps just so he is prepared for anything that I do to happen. I'm always here if you want to talk.

  • BethAA

    173d

    I go through this too with my bi polar 2 and my anger issues. My husband and I will fight and I saw awful things and then he does too and it makes us fight more. I have never doubted he loves me...and I know I love him and want to be with him. I just don't know how to fix my emotional issues. I'm on meds and just had them adjusted so we will see. I wish you luck. If you need to talk I'm here.

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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