Struggling with Extreme Mental Swings in My Relationship

Have you communicated with him on how you feel? Communication is always key! At the same time though, don't just stay with someone because you don't want to be alone.

Have you communicated feelings with them

I relate to this a lot. I’ll be obsessed with my boyfriend and then all of a sudden panic and overthink our whole relationship. We’ve known each other since we were 13 and only starting date last year. He does everything right and puts in so much effort but my OCD makes it so so hard to see clearly. My intrusive thoughts almost act like a barricade between me and thinking logically. I’ll feel stuck for a while until the fog clears. Once it clears I’d recommend writing down everything you love about him to remind yourself when you’re unsure. I’m sorry you have to go through this : (

If you're having doubts it's best to have a break if after a month you still want him then tell him if he's OK with it

honestly i was in the same situation a while back. i put a lot more effort into the relationship and i felt like i wasn’t being treated the way i should be. he was my best friend but our relationship wasn’t what it should’ve been. i communicated clearly what needed to happen for us to stay together and when he refused/didn’t make the effort to communicate back or meet my needs, i broke up with him. if you’re not sure whether it’s because of your conditions or not, try talking to a professional if you have access. but i ended up breaking up with him and it was the best decision i ever made. i met someone else and i’m the happiest i’ve ever been, he puts effort into me, and i don’t ever feel uncertain.

I've been in a relationship for about 2 and a half years. I understand this feeling, but it's important to think logically and weigh the pros and cons of your relationship. I have to do that almost every month because I feel like I'm not enough for her or I'm holding her back. So instead of thinking admit whether I will break up with her or not, I think about how I would feel if SHE broke up with ME. I weigh it based on time, decisions, and feelings. If she broke up with me, what would my immediate reaction be? Then, how would I feel in a week? How would I feel in a month? How soon would I date other people? How soon would she date other people? Would I be happier in the long run? How much of my life would I lose (ie, how many friends/activities depend on her)? Am I staying with her just because it's comfortable? Do either of us feel trapped? It's also important to keep an open dialogue. Find out, is he happy in the relationship? Express how you feel to him and have an honest talk about if you really love each other.

I may not be the best person to weigh in, but you never know what freedom looks like until you go for it. That being said, I've gone thru my life with any connection not lasting more than a month or so. I'm happy to pm to advise more or just listen!