Struggling with Mania and Insomnia

I think I’m going through mania at the moment. Honestly I’ve got a lot of shit going on, my patner threw things at me and screamed a few weeks ago and it started then. I quit my job that I really liked because I disliked my boss telling me I’d basically be better off without my partner(I know he’s right but he wording it in a way that ate at me), I got a new job but I’m terrified to start since different than what I’m used to. I can’t sleep at all at night, when I finally fall asleep it’s only for a couple hours and I need help on fixing that. I don’t take meds because I’ve been trying for the last 4+ years and nothing works, usually they make me worse so I quit a few months back, I no longer go to therapy because it never helps, I get no advice or clues to solving problems/dealing with my conditions so it was just a waste of time. I’m so tired I just want to sleep but I can’t seem to get there.