Struggling with BPD Diagnosis and Life Circumstances

After many years of feeling "not normal", wondering why I am the way I am, why I feel the way I feel-lonely, sad, angry, su* at times, not good enough, etc... At 38, I was finally diagnosed with BPD and I hate that it took someone this long to diagnose me. I've been in therapy since I was a teen and no one ever mentioned BPD. Why did no one figure it out until now? I've survived, not really lived, half of my life hoping that "When I get past this I will be happy...". I'm unhappy, have no kids, unhappy in marriage, my dad-the narcissist who caused me to end up with BPD-disowns me, my mom-i was closest to her-has dementia, and my sister and I are estranged. My husband doesn't get me and blames all of our problems on me. We recently got a puppy, not by my choosing, and I can't handle her. I'm not in my right mind and I told my husband he'd be doing all the work. This is not a good time for us to have a puppy and add all of this stress to our already stressed out lives! He doesn't work because of depression and Idk laziness and I am on disability. My life sucks and I am at a total loss...