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Dealing with Family Invalidation of Chronic Pain

MLee

710d

my dad (who has no autoimmune disorders or chronic conditions) always invalidated my pain from my RA and lately it's been really bad; I have this job as a dishwasher and it's been extremely difficult on my joints and on my last shift I nearly started crying from the pain and today my hands and knees and ankles are all really swollen, but my dad says we need to "fix" my joints because "no job is going to be easy on them" when there's already irreversible damage and it's not a condition that goes away; even my therapist says I should get a new job, one that would be easier for my joints. I've done everything he says but he wont put me on immunosuppressants above methotrexate. how do you get your family to listen?

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3

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Generalized pain

Diffuse connective tissue disease

Rheumatoid Arthritis (RA)

Methotrexate

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Top reply
    • Brooklynn92

      665d

      If you really are over 18, it's not a decision your dad can make for you. Talk to your doctor. The damage you do now will effect the rest of your life. Managing the disease as well as possible is really important for your current and future quality of life. Parents don't always get it and you can't force someone to understand.

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    • Brooklynn92

      665d

      If you really are over 18, it's not a decision your dad can make for you. Talk to your doctor. The damage you do now will effect the rest of your life. Managing the disease as well as possible is really important for your current and future quality of life. Parents don't always get it and you can't force someone to understand.

      1

      Reply
    • rohi55

      706d

      Sometimes it helps to tell them exactly how you feel (trying not to blame obviously), and sometimes it doesn't, in my case my siblings didn't care. I tried to remind myself that it really doesn't matter what they think because my pain is real regardless, and that their validation does not verify that it's there

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      Reply
    • saksgirl02

      707d

      I asked my Husband to educate himself by reading online. It really made a difference as he didn't understand what I was going through.

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      Reply

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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