Feeling Invalidated and Betrayed: My Struggle with Depression and Relationship Issues

I'm so fucking depressed. I've been invalided so much (again) that I don't even know if what I'm feeling is real or valid anymore. I feel like your cheating on me (since you already have) n that you don't really care, "you always feel that way" you don't really care about our children. "man, idk how you can see them suffer, your so strong" who else is gonna do it? I put my feelings aside to be by MY childs side while they are suffering. you don't support me or anything I do, you say you want me to talk about my feelings just to use them against me and then wonder why I don't care about yours, and why I get so defeated towards you. I'm in fight or flight with you, and all you call it is abuse so that you look like the good guy. I always get the short end of the stick. I should have NEVER came back. you made me think that you changed, but through this really hard time you've proven you haven't and that you just don't care.