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Jik

543d

Hi, so I have always struggled with depression/ anxiety, so dating has always been difficult for me. I have been in contact with someone I always considered to be the one that got away for the past year and a half. She is beautiful and sweet but in high school we just never connected correctly. After talking as adults we have had a weird romance that we both didn't know why we weren't together, but we both just haven't been in the right headspace to be together. Last week we finally got romantic with kissing, and I loved it. But now my anxiety is kicking in, she says she still wants to go really slow since we are still working on ourselves in a lot of different ways, but I also don't want to lose what we have. So I am overthinking everything. If I'm doing too much, being too available, trying too hard, or doing the opposite and doing too little. I can't stop thinking about all of the things I've done wrong when spending time with her and it's literally driving me crazy. Am I the only one who panicks this much even when things couldn't be better for me?

Top reply
    • Jik

      542d

      @Edwise yeah, I feel like that just comes with experience though. Once I was with a person or two I wasn't scared to make those moves with more people. It's when I open my heart and try to have an actual romantic connection when it gets wacky

    • Jik

      542d

      yeah I guess this has the potential to become a dating app but you would really have to go out of your way. Yeah for sure, I just panic and think way too much way too fast and the time is killing me haha.

    • Alyh

      542d

      I feel like...there should be a dating app but kinda...maybe like this? Where we are open about our mental illnesses before hand and meet people who have a hard time dating due to it because if how common it is. But I think it's very nice that you guys are taking it slow and working on yourself..it shows good self awareness. And it's always better to get to a good point in your life before dating anyways. Otherwise things just get bad.

    • Edwise

      542d

      Well atleast your stronger than I 😂 I can't muster up the courage to even get on first base with the girl I'm talking to. I start to have panic attacks thinking of that when I'm talking to her, or when she hints at such things. So if you can manage to be with a girl, for even a short amount of time, that's still very good, and you can work towards being better

      • Jik

        542d

        @Edwise yeah, I feel like that just comes with experience though. Once I was with a person or two I wasn't scared to make those moves with more people. It's when I open my heart and try to have an actual romantic connection when it gets wacky

    • Jik

      542d

      yeah we both didn't expect it, it kinda just happened haha. I think she feels safe around me too. We really get along and share a lot of personal stuff with each other. I always just keep wondering if I'm good enough for her like 24/7 🙃

      • 4byfour

        542d

        @Jik I’m happy for you! Keep us updated on your adventure ❤️

        • Jik

          542d

          @4byfour ty I'll do my best 🥺❤️

    • 4byfour

      542d

      I think it’s really sweet that you guys are going for it, while also starting off with good communication! Trust me, you’re definitely not the only one overwhelmed with anxiety! But I understand that it’s harder for us than it is for the average person. I have a feeling she feels really safe around you :) Sometimes going slow means to listen to your mind. If it’s racing, perhaps your body is moving faster than your emotions are. That’s what I learned when I got together with my ‘one who got away’. I think that could be what she means :)

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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