Struggling with Anhedonia and Numbness

Hello I am a 27 year old guy from Iowa. I had a lot of trauma in my life from my dad's suicide to am abusive lover I see every day at work to being im danger in my hometown with sketchy people to lots of death and loss to drug problems in the past. I have intense depression, anxiety and PTSD. I battle with severe anhedonia and miss how if feels to feel anything... can anyone relate? I feel nothing and that isnt am exaggeration. I feel already dead. Nothing evokes pleasure or comfort, no fear or pain shakes me as much. I feel so numb I miss feeling sad...