I'm suffering alone, I feel like no one around me understands how unstable I am. I'm really good at making it seem okay even when I just want to lay down and disappear. I went to my psychiatrist to ask for help and they upped my dosage. I talk to my mom and she just brushes it off. I don't want to burden anyone of the troubles that I'm dealing with I don't want to worry them thinking it'll be the last time they see me. I used to harm and I haven't in a whole year but sometimes I'm almost to that point. I don't want anyone to think I'm doing it for attention but I don't know any other way to cope that actually makes me feel okay. It's getting bad that my sadness just turns to anger and I don't want to lash out but sometimes it's just so hard when more things just pile on. I just feel.like I'm making so many mistakes because my thoughts are just going wild and I can't do anything correct. I keep on making mistakes at work by thinking that I already did the task or my mind just mixes everything together that I can't comprehend, it doesn't help that I don't feel like I'm actually awake and actually doing a task. I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm trying my best by taking my meds everyday and I'm going to see a therapist soon but idk I feel like they won't believe me. it's not the first time this has happened either. If you read this far thank you, I just needed to share.
I completely understand I am going through the same thing. I get constantly accused of doing it for attention when I'm not. I don't have any support, no family and no friends. I'm all alone, my family is either dead or hates me for no reason. My father told me he didn't care if I was dead. He is physically abusive and constantly tells me how much he hates me. I am homeless and so much more going on. It seems like the minute I start to feel better is when it gets worse and worse. Everything just keeps happening and I am never happy. I can't do it anymore.
I'm so sorry that you're going through that, I hope everything starts getting better for you
Thanks! You too! Get well soon
First of all, if you’re not seeing a therapist, you should. Also, the idea that someone self harming for attention just means that they’re expressing their struggles; and want someone to pay attention & help them. I also think this app and other platforms to find people with similar struggles is very helpful.
I’m so sorry you don’t have proper support, I know how hard it can be. As someone mentioned, things like this can be helpful because it’s some form of support and a feeling of not being as alone. I’m here for you anytime. I’m so proud of you for seeking the help you feel you need and taking steps to get better even though you feel this way, that takes an incredibly brave and strong person and I admire you for it. I found without support I had to provide what I needed for myself, I had to find a way to encourage myself even when the other half of me feels hopeless, it’s like a sense of duality, but it’s a means to stay alive, the fact that you’re actively getting help is proof that you’re supporting yourself already, I bet you have so many ways of doing that that you may not realize, like joining this app and writing this post. I know it’s hard and gets unbelievably discouraging a lot of times, but you continue to overcome x
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