Struggling with BPD and Fear of Hurting Others

I don't want to hurt people. I read posts about victims of abuse who's abuser had bpd. I regret things I do so much, I want to bar myself away from people in fear of hurting them. I correct and own up to my behaviors but they chew me up inside. I ask my partner if I'm doing anything wrong, manipulating without knowing, anything. I try to communicate with my partner my feelings and regulating them. I'd say I do a good job at it but sometimes it slips through the cracks. I spend every waking night thinking of all the things I've done wrong, all the ways I've hurt people. I don't want this. I didn't ask for this. but I will keep fighting and keep regulating myself. I don't want to be like the people in the stories I read. I will be better.