Navigating Relationships After Trauma: Can We Trust Our Own Decisions?

As a teenager I took three years off from dating/sex because of the way I felt compelled to agree to things, including relationships themselves, to appease others. I didn't have any boundaries and wouldnt have been able to form healthy relationships and knew it so I just didn't. Sticking to that gave me one boundary to practice for those years and afterwards I slowly practiced more boundaries while dating a partner I had been friends with for years and knew I could trust. It wasnt a cure all of any kind but it did help immensely to take some time to work on myself and my own boundaries and relationship goals/ideals before getting into it again

That's a normal feeling. I felt like that for decades. I can tell you that it's possible to get better, have better boundaries, and not feel horribly vulnerable all the time. I finally feel happy with my relationships (across the board, bot just romantically) and they're respectful. Have you tried the C-PTSD workbook? It's an excellent resource and starting place. I also recommend finding a therapist that has experience treating C-PTSD and that has a complimentary communication style to yours. Remember, you're hiring them, you do have a level of control.

Yeah, I feel like I’m not allowed to have boundaries and say no. I’m used to other people ruling over me and making the decisions. That happened to me for two different relationships that I didn’t really want, yet found myself going along with.