Struggling with Transition: Feeling Hopeless and Alone

I have been on testosterone for two years now and I am barely holding on. My voice barely passes, let alone my face. I know that body fat redistribution takes a while but I barely notice a difference there either. It feels like all I got was a bit of a deeper voice and more hair. I see my trans friends passing so well and other people on the internet who haven't even been on T for a full year yet and I get suicidal. What makes it worse is that my insurance doesn't cover anything and I lost my job due to severe depression a few months ago after my top surgery appointment fell through. Not to mention, I live with people who don't treat me like a person. I am not my name, I am "that one", or occasionally "that thing". They avoid referring to me at all a lot of the time, taking an awkward pause before moving past addressing me. It's either that or aggressive misgendering at every opportunity. I don't think I can do this anymore.