Putting Yourself First: Balancing Self-Care and Socializing

always focus on urself. it's not a matter of when to start. it's okay to help someone in need when u really wanna go home on occasion, but u always always always need to think of urself first. it's not ur responsibility to help all the time. i've struggled with this for so long and i still have moments but i'm proud i've managed to make myself understand i am the most important person in my own life. if people are finding u selfish for putting urself first those arent the people to be around anyway. i know from experience. u can only control your own actions, not those of others. if u do something that's the best choice for urself and someone gets upset, it sounds mean but, that's truly their own issue. it's not ur job to keep everyone happy all the time. i hope this helped. i've always struggled with this and its a true battle bc it comes from a lack or self worth and thats a real and brutal fight with ur own mind. it's tough and it takes time but u can break the habits

I kind of like to think of it as if I’m not running at 100% I can’t give my friends or whoever I love that I want to help my maximum amount of effort, and if I’m running at like 50 or like 60% I might be doing more harm than good if I try to help at all

Practicing self care is the most important step to being someone who can really help others. Try to think of how you would feel if a friend told you they were having a bad day and didn't want to talk or that they said they couldn't hang out tomorrow because they've been kinda stressed out and need to take care of some stuff. if you care about them you wouldn't be upset with them even if you were disappointed, youd be happy they felt comfortable telling you and proud of them for taking good care of themselves. the same goes for your friends to you! sometimes we can get in our heads a lot and assume the worst because we don't think we deserve to be treated well, but it helps me to remember that i like my friends, and i trust them when they say they like me. they aren't stupid, or lying or something they're good people. so why should I trust my depression over my friends?