Feeling Lost and Hopeless in a Fake World

tw: vent, brain dump, possibly triggering topics for some people I feel like I'm constantly in a state of not knowing what to do because everything just sucks. All of it. What is the point of living in this God awful world. There is none. There's no point in being here, and I feel like crap 99% of the time. I hate it. And I hate the fact that I know I'm not gonna do anything about it. My dissociation does not help at all, and so not only does this world not have a point, it's not even real to begin with! Yay. Fake, stupid life with fake, stupid people. I just want to lay in bed all day and do nothing but cry and sort my thoughts out by myself, but I can't bring myself to do anything of the sort. I hate feeling this way. I have nobody that could give me advice that I'm willing to reach out to or that could say anything helpful. Music and sleeping are pretty much my only coping mechanisms right now because nothing else works and I have no hobbies that I enjoy anymore. Life sucks so much. I hate it. But I have to keep living, without a point to it, because I'm too much of a coward to end my own life. If anyone actually read this and made it this far, thanks for listening to my dumb rant. Sorry to dump this on anyone, or no one. Sorry. I don't know what to do anymore.