Feeling Alone and Unworthy of Love

T.W. I am repeating this post because I am unsure if my first one went through. I am feeling super depressed right now sitting up in my room alone because even if I talked about it with my husband he would not understand. I just feel like I am not worthy of love. I have a condition that caused a deformity to my face and all my life I have been tortured because of it. I look in the mirror at myself and feel like just ending it all. I have a feeling that due to it I have never been loved, I mean even as a child my mother always treated me differently than my brother. I really just want to cry but I can't because I am all cried out over all the things that have deeply hurt me. I am so tired of feeling all alone. I mean even when me and my husband are in the same room he is too busy on his phone and ignores me anyway so why should I even sit down there. I can feel alone all by myself it hurts more when you are being ignored by someone who claims that they love you. I just feel like ending it like I don't want to be here any longer I sometimes wish I was never born at all. Please I am asking for any guidance at all.