I have a mental illness that's part of the schizophrenia illness . When the symptoms are powerful enough to make me frustrated , angry , mad I feel a huge amount of energy and emotion that I feel like I need to physically need to act now and to release all of it . Which I resort to punching anything or throwing anything sometimes I will throw stuff at the floor to break . Which I did all of that recently so my point is I may be evicted in a few days because I have to speak to my landlord about the damages sooner than later . As for now regret is the beast haunting me with the actions' that I did earlier this week .