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Viynnyie

176d

I would like some advice and opinions about a situation I've been in for a while and it's starting to get to me. I have a friend who's NT and Able boddied, and I hang out with them frequently. Since I'm with them for a chunk of hours, I stim quite a lot and 9 times out of 10 they immediately go "Ew", "Gross", or make a noticable stank face, and then I try and force myself to stop and stay quiet. I do this because I don't want to creat a situation for confrontation because I'm quite scared of it if I'm honest, and its easier to just say and do nothing. It makes my body feel really uncomfortable because not stimming makes me feel like my skin is crawling and makes me irritated. I don't know if I should take offense to this because I'm a major people pleaser (I'm trying to work on it) and have been through complicated relationships where I could never judge someone's intentions. How do I go about this situation? I'm really in the dark here

Top reply
    • buttercupdaisy

      176d

      Even if you didn't have autism and other conditions, if someone you're friends with judges a harmless way of you feeling more comfortable, they're not being a good friend in my opinion. You should find people that love seeing you stim because they know that means you're comfortable and they want the best for you.

    • buttercupdaisy

      176d

      Even if you didn't have autism and other conditions, if someone you're friends with judges a harmless way of you feeling more comfortable, they're not being a good friend in my opinion. You should find people that love seeing you stim because they know that means you're comfortable and they want the best for you.

    • Finleaf

      176d

      They're ableist, plain and simple. Stimming is not bad or gross. Being disabled is not bad or gross. They know you're autistic and express disgust when you display autistic traits... they don't accept or respect you for who you are. You deserve so much better from a friend 💜

    • Viynnyie

      176d

      Alos they know I have autism and the other conditions I have, and what it means for me and how it makes me feel yet they always show signs of discust when I do essentially anything.

      • minime273

        176d

        @Viynnyie maybe you need to distance yourself from them. You should not feel the need to make yourself uncomfortable for them.

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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Based on the context provided, some suggestions include explaining to your friend why you stim and how it helps you. You could also try finding more subtle ways to stim that might not draw as much attention. However, it's important to remember that you should be able to be yourself around your friends. If they continue to react negatively even after understanding your situation, it may be worth reconsidering the relationship.

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