Struggling with Anxiety: What Can I Do?

I'm 2nd generation Polish and I was "socialized wrong" according some of the people I encountered when I was little and even now into my adult life. Slowly it kept getting worse and I feel like I don't belong in public and think everyone is staring at me cause I'm acting wrong by simply pushing a cart wrong. I know it sounds extra but my brain does this to me all the time. I tries doing hobbies but I don't have the energy and when I do, my bf gets mad because I'm not doing what he wants to do...

What types of activities at home do you enjoy, do you have a pet, or enjoy caring for plans, do you draw or use adult coloring. I ask because it sounds like you could use a distraction until you can see your therapist. Do you meditated. Im sorry you feel like this. I use to avoid many social settings because of anxiety, but slowly started to attend and have been successful . Do you know why you have fear , and anxiety.