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PrettyPolar2

432d

What should I do? I just got in a fight with my sister (G), and I learned that she is more unethical than I ever imagined. While my other sister (C) was neglecting (leaving them alone and not changing their diaper) and putting her child in danger (having a shotgun and hand gun easily assessable in their room)I asked G for help in confronting C. G did a miserable job and told me today that it isn't her job to "Save the world, and meddle in other peoples business". After both G and I talked to C she stopped neglecting her child and both her and her husband have started taking loving and parenting their child seriously. I see that as the most important thing out of the situation. My emotions and personal respect were destroyed by G in the process. We used to talk weekly and FaceTime most of those times. I am having the same experience I had like 8 years ago during my first manic episode when I saw the dark side of my mom. I still want to be friends with her but deep down my gut tells me to let her go for the betterment of my life and emotional state. What should I do?

    • IndigoBro

      432d

      It sounds like you want G in your life, considering you sought her support in confronting C. And even though she did poorly, G did go with you and at the very least I think that means she wants to have a relationship with you and try to work with you regardless of the task at hand. It sounds to me like G did not realize what confronting C would entail, and clearly struggled to challenge C. I see you putting in the work to educate G and no matter what in the long run you are teaching G how the world works, which will benefit her even if takes her years to understand what you were doing. And to me that is a sign that you care very much about G, and you feel the need to educate her ethically. That shit is hard. It sounds like you both need some time to repair the rupture in your relationship. Whether you need to cut G out of your life, I think it’s too early to tell. I see signs that you are good for each other. The main thing is to give yourself time and space to handle your own things. You can’t use all of your energy on parenting your siblings, you need to be the one to reserve some of your energy to work on your own life.

      • PrettyPolar2

        431d

        @IndigoBro Wow you hit the nail on the head with reading the situation and how I feel towards G and how C is a challenging person to confront. Also I'm happy that it wasn't to too confusing with the letters lol I do have a hard time with wanting to teach my siblings, G is 7 years older than me and C is 5 and they both have either denied, avoided or tried to spiritually heal their undiagnosed mental disorders. I have Bipolar 2 disorder and C and G have been depressed multiple times in their lives and act like everything is fine after they feel healthy again. They both can be passive aggressive and it is hard when my nieces and nephews are involved because I don't want to miss out on their lives because my sisters and I can't get along. And then problem is that G is so aggressive about not taking any advice from me or anyone that isn't married or don't have kids. I have been a professional nanny for 10 years and I do research about children's development a lot because I'm considering being a child psychologist, but she doesn't respect any of that. The hardest part is that she has given me so much advice over the years and it has been shit most of the time. I told her I'm am going to take a break and she left me a nasty voice message after our phone call and so we are mutually agreeing on not talking for a while. We both said we loved each other though so it isn't a forever thing. I am just tired of waiting for her to learn life skills, boundaries, healthy confrontation, being confortable in social situations and not blaming everyone for her lack of relationship skills. I'm not exempt from that list of things to learn but I hate knowing more things than someone and them choosing to charge ahead in ignorance. I think I need to be more introspective in this situation because she shouldn't make me this mad. Do you have siblings?

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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