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Dealing with Severe Anxiety During Family Gatherings

styx

545d

i have severe anxiety and it gets really bad when i get yelled at or if someone makes me feel like i've done something wrong. my family is throwing a party today and every time we throw a party my mom turns into a psycho trying to make everything look presentable. she starts screaming and lashing out at whoever is nearby. i've already had an anxiety attack once today because of it and i fucked up my hand trying to stop it. im already on zoloft for my anxiety but it doesn't help when it gets this bad. i feel so on edge and i know it's stupid and irrational and i know this is how she gets but i can't control how my body reacts. im constantly trying not to cry and break down and i feel so helpless right now. it's stupid but im scared. is there anything i can do or take or something to make it more bareable. like something over the counter i might already have that maybe could help calm me down.

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Depression

Anxiety (Including GAD)

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    • darkstarrynight

      544d

      @TheBigSpook I'm not saying the anxiety is a bad habit. I'm saying having a bad reaction is the bad habit. I cry when my mom yells at me, because that's what my brain is trained to do. I'm saying that it's a subconscious habit, but it's not easy to break. Having anxiety is understandable. (My theory is that if I or someone else were to stop reacting when that happens, eventually I or someone else would be less bothered by it.)

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    • Turtle_

      545d

      Please remember that this isnt your fault and you are not to blame for the situation

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    • darkstarrynight

      545d

      I know this seem strange, but you might have to numb your emotions or try not to react when she does that. I understand, because I cry when my mom yells at me. But if you teach your body not to have a response, it could help break the bad habit. If you can't do that, walk away or excuse yourself from the room when she does that. You're having this anxiety because your subconscious feels scared when it's yelled at.

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      • TheBigSpook

        544d

        @darkstarrynight I’d like to just offer my experience here. Feeling anxiety is a biological safety mechanism necessary to survive, and not a bad habit. Choosing to not feel your feelings, while it is an effective coping method in the moment, will bottle up the anxiety and the fear, and it WILL come out later when you least expect it. If you get really good at numbing your feelings, you might completely lose the ability to express your emotions properly or cry, and you’ll feel emotionally stunted. The anxiety will still be there, but you won’t be able to express it properly. Separating yourself though when your mom is yelling is a great strategy. If she’s going to behave in aggressive and abusive ways, she can do it without you there for it. When she’s calm, I think it would be helpful for you to talk to her about her behavior. That it is hurtful and unacceptable. I’m sorry you’re going through this. ❤️

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        • darkstarrynight

          544d

          @TheBigSpook I'm not saying the anxiety is a bad habit. I'm saying having a bad reaction is the bad habit. I cry when my mom yells at me, because that's what my brain is trained to do. I'm saying that it's a subconscious habit, but it's not easy to break. Having anxiety is understandable. (My theory is that if I or someone else were to stop reacting when that happens, eventually I or someone else would be less bothered by it.)

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☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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