Struggling with Intimacy: Seeking Advice

I have just refused every chance or hope of a relationship or being intimate again, I’m not saying anyone should do that, that’s just the only way I know how to deal with it personally. It’s upsetting cause I’ve always been proud of my sexuality and now I feel like that candle has been completely extinguished, I feel it would be hard to enjoy it even if I found someone willing to do it so I’ve just accepted relationships and sex aren’t and won’t be a part of my life anymore.