Feeling Alone in Asymmetrical Relationships

We feel like most if not all of our relationships are asymmetrical... like we work to keep them going but others don't and when we run out of spoons to maintain them the connections just die and we're alone again. We're a queer system that just wants someone to want us, to have someone think abt us and do thoughtful things for us, to love us, to msg us first at least sometimes instead of never