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Dealing with an Alcoholic Brother

Kadair

442d

I am so angry right now! My brother who is an alcoholic and I have caught him buying "pills" supposedly at the beginning of December. Which doesn't make sense, because two days prior he had a doctor's appointment where he could have gotten a prescription for the doctor for them. Anyway, I don't believe him at all. I kicked him out and since then he has come over and brought beer in my house! The place he is staying at is a drug and alcohol free place. He admitted to my husband that they have given him a breath alizor test. I know they wouldn't have done so unless they could smell his breath or he had slurred speech. Now he has been kicked out supposedly for a week. Last time he came over he tried to convince my husband to stay in the garage if he got kicked out. Well now he has and he tried once more to convince my husband to let him stay again in the garage. I am not allowing it at all. I can not do it and I won't! There is no lock on the garage and he has been caught sleeping in there yesterday, my husband saw him head to the garage. Today I am getting locks for the garage. I am not going to be an enabler or be used. We have helped him for over 4 years to get back on his feet and all he has done is steal, lie, and drink! I am emotionally done! My anxiety is through the roof all the time when he is around. Yesterday my bpm hit 128! My episodes are happening more often and it is physically exhausting! Just venting here!

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5

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Depression

Dissociation

Anxiety (Including GAD)

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Top reply
    • brendaboppers

      442d

      A few things... 1. I'm so sorry you're going through this. 2. You can be supportive of your brother and still not allow him to stay with you. You helped him find a place he could live. It is not on you that he couldn't stay sober to stay there. There is no reason you can't have the same rules for staying at your home. 3. You're an amazing sister. It is so hard to see a loved one go down the road of addiction. Setting boundaries to keep you and your household safe is HEALTHY. Taking care of you and your needs is HEALTHY. You're doing the right thing, even if it is heartbreaking.

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    • brendaboppers

      442d

      A few things... 1. I'm so sorry you're going through this. 2. You can be supportive of your brother and still not allow him to stay with you. You helped him find a place he could live. It is not on you that he couldn't stay sober to stay there. There is no reason you can't have the same rules for staying at your home. 3. You're an amazing sister. It is so hard to see a loved one go down the road of addiction. Setting boundaries to keep you and your household safe is HEALTHY. Taking care of you and your needs is HEALTHY. You're doing the right thing, even if it is heartbreaking.

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    • PhoenixValkyrie

      442d

      At this point, it sounds like he's taking advantage. Maybe he does need tough love. Tell him when you see him making the effort to improve himself, you will be there to support him. But for your own self care/ mental health, you can not allow him to have free range of your life. Especially since he is not putting in the extra effort for himself. There has to be boundaries. That's just my suggestion. Not telling you what to do. But you have to take care of you, too. Maybe when he sees that you have reached your limit, it will wake him up to the seriousness of his choices.

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    • Somia

      442d

      Hi I can understand your concern about your experience with your brother but I think he always needs his sisters help

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      • Kadair

        442d

        @Somia I understand but for over 4 years I have helped and tried to get him in the right direction. He is an amputee and I got him on insurance that paid for his prosthetic. I also tried to help him with someone who could get him schooling that he wouldn't have to pay for. I also helped him in so many ways. He got a job but never helped with bills. All he did was get himself snacks or beer. He never bought groceries or paid any bills. But one thing that topped it off was seeing him buy drugs! I can't do it! My body can not deal with this.

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    • Somia

      442d

      šŸ˜„

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ā˜ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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