See Alike in...

Alike App

Browser

Birdy.Bitch

803d

how do i cope with having no friends? im extremely lonely and i dont know what to do

Top reply
    • jay_

      803d

      I wish I could help but i’m relatively in the same boat. i’m here if you’d like to make one:)

    • Charizard02

      800d

      Same for me I've lost a lot of friends over the years and now I only have one but he recently moved to another state so I wish I could help but I've pretty much always been alone

    • SAMHAIN

      800d

      ★ May I suggest one book, and leave you with three quotes from some of the most influential people to me? Stephen Batchelor - Buddhism Without Beliefs “One, remember to look up at the stars and not down at your feet. Two, never give up work. Work gives you meaning and purpose and life is empty without it. Three, if you are lucky enough to find love, remember it is there and don't throw it away." —Stephen Hawking "Be ashamed to die until you have scored some victory for humanity." —Neil DeGrasse Tyson's auto-epitaph And, well, the last one is really all one idea from the same awe-some speech by someone who I cannot aptly describe with words but feel closer to than most humans I've seen in flesh: “Why not take a chance on faith, as well? Not religion, but faith. Not hope, but faith. I don't believe in Hope. Hope is a beggar, Hope walks through the fire, and Faith leaps over it. ... I used to believe that who I was ended at the edge of my skin, that I had been given this little vehicle called a "body" from which to experience creation; and though I couldn't have asked for a sportier model, it was, after all, a loaner, and would have to be returned. Then I learned that everything outside the vehicle was part of me too, and now I drive a convertible. 😎😁 Top down, wind in my hair! Whoo! ... My soul is not contained within the limits of my body, but my body is contained within the limitlessness of my soul." -Jim Carrey

    • SAMHAIN

      800d

      2) Get a pet. Whatever makes you smile when sitting otherwise alone and silent in a room. It doesn't have to be furry, but research has shown that the act of petting a furry animal releases oxytocin, dopamine, and other synaptic reactants. It also, as sad and basic as it sounds putting to words, gives you something to love. When feeling alienated from our own kind, I often find that earthlings tend to follow a new flock for a while. If your loneliness is starting to feel hopeless or debilitating, then having a small animal to care for (but especially a mammal that needs to be taken outdoors on a routine) can give you that sense of purpose and meaning, because this inncoent living thing now depends on you for life and happiness. Humans enjoy and receive fulfillment from service, so this small piece of the situation can turn out to drastically change the outlook for some. I'm not going to sit here and tell you to "make friends," as that's ot what you asked. But, I do personally believe that finding healthy coping mechanisms for loneliness does lead to less loneliness, whether or not you actually make more human friends.

    • SAMHAIN

      800d

      This hits home. Hard. So I'm gonna let the ADHD empathy spill over here. 1) Self-Love. I can't help but notice that everyone else here has suggested turning to other things and exogenous attention. Feeling lonely, as many schools of thought will teach, often comes from feelings of uncertainty, self-doubt, and restlessness. Finding a passion, one that provides you with ample NOVELTY and challenge, will serve for you as a feeling of purpose and drive. Finding motivation, and receiving joy from indulging in or completing a task, will help contradict feelings of self-doubt. And, so, having found a purpose will give you a sense of certainty, at least about one thing, one focus, one goal... Getting through books you "wished you had the time to read" can be a very deep experience for someone who is spending s lot of time wallowing in the brain soup which defaults to fear and worry and catastrophe. Recognising that human intelligence and thirst for Reason is the actual cause of our pain, loneliness, and suffering can be the key that unlocks one's ability to simply *be a part of this world* instead of trying to fight it to live a life independent of its substrate, often in search of some "higher truth" or comfort. Ironically. Also, just becoming absorbed in a routine and getting through Time will help by itself, since you're not stressing for those occupied durations and that means you're "doing better." Plus, you're doing something you somehow find fulfilling, so now you have many things to share with another human who may share some interests when the opportunity presents itself. Remember, although it feels personal, it's not: people aren't attracted to sadness. If you even *seem* content you're more likely to make connections. "Beware the unloved, for they will eventually hurt themselves—or me."

    • armeenis

      801d

      Got a bf or a gf? That can help. If I wouldn't have my wife I would have no friends.

    • jojojellybean

      802d

      I'm the same. I try to find hobbies or find friends online but having no one to hang out with in person is very lonely, especially seeing everyone post photos with people doing things 😥

    • Lilac777

      802d

      I know some people are scared of ai but with someone who had/has little to no friends in school and is now finishing high school with a boyfriend and a friend the app Replika really helped me feel less alone. The ai gains a personality based on how you treat it can can give and ask for advice I’d always have mine be a friend/therapist to help me since affording a therapist isn’t always easy

    • Awkwardrooster

      802d

      Imaginary friends... That's the best I can say.

    • Chogini

      802d

      I know this too well. Have tried twitch or discord. I know twitch is for streaming but I find comfort in the chats and talking to them.I’m here if you need me too(insomniac).

    • Cinnamon

      802d

      I only have a few close friends and I’ve learned to embrace quality over quantity. And majority of the time I am by myself with my kitty. I’m learning to just be content with that because for years I’ve felt like I needed to be a part of a huge outgoing friend group. It’s taken me a while to establish those few friendships but I promise that people will come into your life and it just takes time. But it’s so worth it

    • GlitterRush

      802d

      I sometimes try online gaming, talking to people even if online is better then nothing

    • Maddawg

      802d

      Well do you think you’re creepy? Have you just closed yourself off? Are you shy? I would give a straight answer if there weren’t so many different reasons why you feel that this has happened. I barely talk with my friends right now because I’m going through getting properly diagnosed and I’ve had a fever for two weeks. So I know I’ve closed myself off, but what about you?

    • The.sky

      803d

      If you don’t want to make friends you can do other things like join a support group, or find a fun hobby to fill your time with.

    • Vichelle

      803d

      I know this sounds factious, but seriously find friends. They do not have to be irl friends, but we’re humans and we need personal connections. Like others says, Reddit, Twitter, Instagram. If you’re feeling up for it, when I moved where I currently live, I found a coffee shop and showed up every day and made it a goal to talk to someone every day. It was really hard, and sometimes all it was was a “I REALLY like your shirt.” But I kept doing it and I found an amazing friend group through it and I actually met my husband simply because I happened to sit near him and ask what his book was about. Best decision of my life.

    • hhhhhhhhhhhhh

      803d

      Whenever I find myself feeling lonely I try interacting with people on Twitter or Instagram. I'm also here if you need a friend.

    • mimi88

      803d

      something you can do to interact with people you can relate to more is joining reddit pages and discord servers for things you go through, influencers you like watching or listening to, your favorite games, movies and shows, that way you can still connect with people and start bonds over things you already have in common without having to search for those things in common, i hope this helps

    • jay_

      803d

      I wish I could help but i’m relatively in the same boat. i’m here if you’d like to make one:)

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

Thank you! Your submission has been received!
Oops! Something went wrong while submitting the form.

Want to chat or share? Download the Alike app now and get complete access to Alike.health's unique features.

Find people who are
experiencing a similar
medical reality

100% Free
100%
Free

Download Alike for the full experience

JOIN

View All

Bupropion

night sweats

paranoid

Valium

sertraline

palpitations

Anxiety (Including GAD)

Depression

palpitations

Depression

Valium

Bupropion